I read yet another book recently, called The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz. I read his other books, too. I like him, very inspiring.
In this book he is delving into Love, in all forms. Love among humans. Love between men and women and most importantly, love for yourself. He says, simply put, love starts from within ourselves. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot love others.
He has a very nice illustration of this concept as a magic kitchen. He explains, imagine you have a magic kitchen at home. You can have the most delightful food of the entire universe at all times as much as you want. It is all yours, it will never finish, even if you share it with everyone for the rest of your life. It sounds like a fairy tale, no?
One day, someone knocks on your door and he is a pizza delivery guy. He says, look I have delicious pizza here for you, but if you want a slice you need to do this list of things for me. What would you say? Thanks, but no thanks, I have my magic kitchen, I don’t really need a slice of your (cold) pizza.
Imagine the opposite now. You have no magic kitchen at home and you are starving to death. The pizza guy rings your bell, offers the same, and you of course jump on it because you are hungry. And the story starts. Tomorrow you are hungry again, so you wait for the pizza guy. If he is late you start fearing if he will ever show up. What if not? Will you ever get a slice of pizza again? Will you starve? Before you know, you are attached to the pizza guy.
Now, magic kitchen is your self-love and the pizza delivery guy is someone, who gives you conditional love. Someone who says, I will give you my love only if you do this and that for me.
Don asks, which one do you prefer? Magic kitchen or the cold, uncertain pizza slice?
It is brilliant and it made me think. I thought of water suddenly. Maybe also because it is my name: Spring Water. Water is free. It is out there, you can have it as much as you like, anytime you like. People, who conditionally love you though, want to make you pay for it.
What happens then?
I had to pay for my water too, so I had to reflect on this. When I realized I had to pay for my water I got angry first. Why I asked myself? Why is this injustice? What have I done to deserve this? Others get it for free, why do I have to pay for my water? So, I was angry at the people who made me pay.
Then, I understood that those, who made me pay, never knew it otherwise themselves. They had paid for their own water, too. They applied what they learned, for they never knew it otherwise. This was the “understanding”.
Once I understood this, I also understood that I have a choice. I don’t actually, really, have to pay for my water, I can also get it for free. So, I can choose to go to the wells with free water and drink it there. This was “awareness”.
Finally, I realized that I can also also be a well of free water myself and I do not have to go to other wells at all to drink it. I can even share my own free water with all others, because I have it so plentiful. Better yet, it becomes even more plentiful and delicious when I share it. This was the “joy”.
And how is it with you? Do you have your magic kitchen? Are you the free water well?